Grrrr

So I couldn't be any more frustrated today! Not only I am going through this 2ww, i am having some major problems at work. Ok first off my boss is a complete douche bag who is never there, who lies, and who sexually harrases little girls, actually all girls for that matter!!!!! So here lies my dilemma, i wrote my district manager an email that I neded to talk to him I basically was going to tell him about everything that has happened at my job and everything my manager has done. But all of a sudden I get a freakin consious and I feel sort of bad. mind you I think he is freaking creep but I still feel bad.

I want to transfer to another store ASAP, my store has so much dramam and not enough work! Ok Starbucks is supposed to be super friendly and the third place blah blah blah, come into our store and we treat ya like shit! Everyone who has been working there has been there for quite some time so they are set in their ways, can't teach an old dog new tricks ect. No one there wants to do their job and for me to get them to I have to ask them fifty million times!!! Meanwhile my boss is skirt chasing and stalking his wife all day.

Not only is all that a problem it is the fact that I work my ass off to make this amns life easier and I get shit on for doing it. A girl can't get a simple thank you!!! Meanwhile this fuck face is getting paid triple what I am and I am doing all of his grunt work. I wish this store coulsd be just like other stores, friendly, come in to get a job done, and treat eachother with respect!!!! No one has respect there for anyone!

An example of this would be my co worker Bunny, the freakin dude has been there for like 10 f'ing years and is still a barista, he has no desire to move up, to eduacate himself, to become an actual working man. He works like 20 hrs a week, lives with his parents, and dates a ton of random women who are all under the age of 20. Sooo my point here is he actually took a big old water bug like the ones you find outside and put it in another co workers drink, the poor guy drinks the drink, finds the g'damn bug and gets so pissed! I would have punched Bunny in his freaking face!! So I am disgusted he actually did this and I tell my manager, what does my manager do? he LAUGHS!!! To me that is just wrong on every level!!!!

Basically if you are catching my drift I hate my freaking job!!! No joke I am about to blow up on someone!!! All the while I am trying to relax and not be stressed cause were trying to have a baby!!! I need out of my store and tranfered to a new one before I seriously flip!!!

Does prometrium make you moody? LOL AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

It's done

So today was the insemination at 10:30 A.M. It actually went really well, it didn't hurt as much as last time and there was barely any bleeding as opposed to last time there was alot more. Afterwards we went to Acapolco to eat lunch and I had the best fajitas ever!!! heheh. I have been dieting and exercising everyday until today where I ate bad, and wanted to take it easy until tomorrow, so I did light exercise today.

Anywho besides that everything is great, we just really want this to work this time. It's so hard to get excited because I don't want to jinx myself, I know it sounds insane but I don't wanna be heartbroken. I just want this so bad, and wish I had people nearby for support :(

Second Round here we come :)

Well yesterday was the first day of Clomid, which they upped to 150 mil rather than 100 mil. I am hopeful this time , the same as last, but I can't help but feel sad after reading many other blogs of lots AND lots of trying. I want this more than anything I have ever wanted, and to be let down again is really hard especially after all the stress I am already going throughwith work. I feel scared to be positive because I think the let down will be harder that way :(

A big fat Negative staring at me

Sooo what a crazy two weeks it has been and oh what alot of pregnancy tests. I am a woman who likes to know everything, so 2 weeks wasn't possible. I think I averaged 7 tests in that time hoping I would get a positive eventually, but no, nothing changed, just one lonely line.

I am feeling exhausted mentally by all of this. I also feel physically exhausted, from doing all of this and working and taking care of the house as well as our other son and dog! Wooo that was alot to say :)

so we are going to wait until i see AF yet again and try our 2nd insemination the same exact way as this last time. I had a friend tell me I should use egg whites before the insemination and put them in well you know where. Sounds crazy to me but I am getting alot of crazy advice. what is nice is all the support I am getting from the ladies at work, they all want this for me so bad, it's really sweet.

Anyway if there are any couples out there in blog land who would like to share their experiences with me please do. :)